***WARNING****
This poem in no way reflects me, or anyone I know. It is just an untold story. Enjoy.
I’ve been going through a lot these past couple months
I don’t know where I am no more
I think I’m still in my bed
& I’m just dreamin
If possible I wanna relive my life from start/Tryna stay so bright I still end the dark/don’t know if I can play while I live in the park/I might as well stay on the park bench then live from the start/I’m tryna start over and do the right thing/But I don’t even know how to find me a queen/When I’m no longer a king/I’ve done too many things/too many wrongs/too many blessing I deceive &/chose not to receive/now I’m looking at other people like can they perceive/all the pain I’ve been through/all the strife/I’m tryna turn all my wrongs to right/but I hope I’m just dreamin’
To live or not to live/now I’m the judge and jury/I’m know I’m not Him/and I wasn’t born purely/But damn/At least I was born/and I’m sorry/But we were both so torn and unwarned/Backed into a corner of no return/I guess this is just another life lesson learned/I’m so scared now that m soul may burn/knowing that a gave up God’s gift when it was my turn/This is so hard to put into words/cause in March I know your voice won’t get to be heard/My pops said man-up/cause what’s done is done/but I know he ain’t too proud of his son/ lucky I’m just dreamin’
I done sold my soul for 400 pieces of gold/I know I should feel the heat/but rather I feel so cold/I feel so cruel/this wasn’t a part of lifes rule/God knew this would happen/So why was it me that he choose/& I don’t even understand my life/Tryna life through the pain/Tryna fight the strife/I pray to skies like “Father let me in”/Just have a heart and forgive all my sins/I’m so sorry for what I did/I would love it so much to hear the breath of my kid/& this is something that I’ll never forget/& as for myself/I’ll never forgive/ MAN I’M GLAD I’M JUST DREAMING
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Monday, August 9, 2010
the|rapist
Things being forced
No longer asked
Rather told
iFeel like they’re looking directly into my soul
But not a soul hears these cries
Just another black soul left to die
Left to commit an internal suicide
But wait
Someone is the cause of this homicide
This rape
Everything forced to be given
As I feel them taken
I just lie there
Not sure of what’s next
So much is transpiring between each breath
But there’s nothing I can do
My soul
My thoughts
My all
Exposed
All to a stranger
The More it continues
The More I’m ripped apart
I know from it I won’t be the same
Why can’t I shed light in this dark
I’m trapped
Stuck between much more than a rock
& I wish it a hard place on the other side
I’m not sure how much more of this I can take
My mind is panicking
I try to squeeze tight
But it all just escapes
& I can’t stop it
Everything is flowing
Nile-like
Music is what iWish it could these sounds sound like
But this is real life
& I’m reminded every second I’m here
Every tear
Every provoked thought
Throughout this never-ending story
It worries me
Where will my befrom here
Especially when it seems like this is the only person in a while who hears
iTried
iFought
But how quickly iSee
Maybe this is what life had in store for me
Maybe this position is where I’m supposed to be
iWish I could I stop it
End this madness
But it continues
More vigorously
The rest of my
Mind
Body
Soul
Taken from me
All for this moment in time
& as it concludes
If you could see these eyes
If only it were in my mind
If only I was being incepted
Then I could have some bliss
But this shit
Has caused my
Mind
Body
Soul
All to rip
Exposed to be built right again
Thanks to therapist
This is a metaphor. I make this statement so that you understand the poem, and take time to read it more than once. Maybe then you will see its real mean. The clear meaning, nor methophorical meaning are no reflection on my life. They are story that came to me from a misinterpretation. Thank you for reading. Leave comments.
No longer asked
Rather told
iFeel like they’re looking directly into my soul
But not a soul hears these cries
Just another black soul left to die
Left to commit an internal suicide
But wait
Someone is the cause of this homicide
This rape
Everything forced to be given
As I feel them taken
I just lie there
Not sure of what’s next
So much is transpiring between each breath
But there’s nothing I can do
My soul
My thoughts
My all
Exposed
All to a stranger
The More it continues
The More I’m ripped apart
I know from it I won’t be the same
Why can’t I shed light in this dark
I’m trapped
Stuck between much more than a rock
& I wish it a hard place on the other side
I’m not sure how much more of this I can take
My mind is panicking
I try to squeeze tight
But it all just escapes
& I can’t stop it
Everything is flowing
Nile-like
Music is what iWish it could these sounds sound like
But this is real life
& I’m reminded every second I’m here
Every tear
Every provoked thought
Throughout this never-ending story
It worries me
Where will my befrom here
Especially when it seems like this is the only person in a while who hears
iTried
iFought
But how quickly iSee
Maybe this is what life had in store for me
Maybe this position is where I’m supposed to be
iWish I could I stop it
End this madness
But it continues
More vigorously
The rest of my
Mind
Body
Soul
Taken from me
All for this moment in time
& as it concludes
If you could see these eyes
If only it were in my mind
If only I was being incepted
Then I could have some bliss
But this shit
Has caused my
Mind
Body
Soul
All to rip
Exposed to be built right again
Thanks to therapist
This is a metaphor. I make this statement so that you understand the poem, and take time to read it more than once. Maybe then you will see its real mean. The clear meaning, nor methophorical meaning are no reflection on my life. They are story that came to me from a misinterpretation. Thank you for reading. Leave comments.
Monday, August 2, 2010
Double Entendre
As this chapter closes
New ones find ways to bleed the page
The thoughts of this past won’t quickly fade away
My mind wanders where should I be, damn near every day
But I hide all these thoughts, it’s not time for me to say
Yet I need to decide before it is too late
& create troubles that God would forsake
This is the story of my life
In more than one way…
Sunday, August 1, 2010
Lyrical Breakdown
Lately,I've been searching for peace/Looking from the west to east/Knowing that I cannot change my lease/My mind has resulted in a backwards spelled raw/That I cannot seem to overcome/I don’t feel complete/I’m empty inside/So loneliness it what makes me weak/I’m fallen/Only to be held up by means of spiritual/So it would be a miracle/If I can get over this with a breakdown that’s lyrical
See I’m confused as to the world I live in/How much it’s been consumed with sin/And the acceptance that we could care less/But see I believe that the deaths of those in power/Was conspired by those who tower/Over or communities/Basically the cops! Look at our figures Abe Lincoln and Dr. King/There assassins were caught/But certainly taught/Rather instilled that would be fine in prison/Though they were lied to/Cause see the cops couldn’t tell the truth/But then they got smarter/And used the East Coast-West Coast Beef as a barter/And had two influential rappers become hip hop martyrs/And their cases will still be open at the birth of my granddaughter/So no longer do I listen to cops lies/As they continue hide/Fallacies through eyes/That no one cares to notice, cries
So I’m trying to open eyes to see what we lack to notice/It seems my only way though may be through rhyming words that are spoken/In the like of Common/But I don’t have a deal the makes Sense/So I’m confined to a pen and paper/And to an internet control by those same liars/Who may now conspire/To find a way/To have my words retired
I pay attention to many/And see how their love is plenty/And how quickly they’re in and out/So honestly does anyone these days know what love is about/No one stays together for 28years like my folks/Once they have kids/Their relationships are up in smokes/I’m concerned as to what the non Hip Hop music has done to our brains/Because instead of kissing like we’ll never see each other again/We’re both out running game/Scared to settle because of past pains/But why should that stop us if it’s God’s wish to share names/But then again who’s praying these days
I’m falling further/Only to be held up spiritual/So it would be a miracle/If I can get over this emptiness I call I breakdown/Lyrical
See I’m confused as to the world I live in/How much it’s been consumed with sin/And the acceptance that we could care less/But see I believe that the deaths of those in power/Was conspired by those who tower/Over or communities/Basically the cops! Look at our figures Abe Lincoln and Dr. King/There assassins were caught/But certainly taught/Rather instilled that would be fine in prison/Though they were lied to/Cause see the cops couldn’t tell the truth/But then they got smarter/And used the East Coast-West Coast Beef as a barter/And had two influential rappers become hip hop martyrs/And their cases will still be open at the birth of my granddaughter/So no longer do I listen to cops lies/As they continue hide/Fallacies through eyes/That no one cares to notice, cries
So I’m trying to open eyes to see what we lack to notice/It seems my only way though may be through rhyming words that are spoken/In the like of Common/But I don’t have a deal the makes Sense/So I’m confined to a pen and paper/And to an internet control by those same liars/Who may now conspire/To find a way/To have my words retired
I pay attention to many/And see how their love is plenty/And how quickly they’re in and out/So honestly does anyone these days know what love is about/No one stays together for 28years like my folks/Once they have kids/Their relationships are up in smokes/I’m concerned as to what the non Hip Hop music has done to our brains/Because instead of kissing like we’ll never see each other again/We’re both out running game/Scared to settle because of past pains/But why should that stop us if it’s God’s wish to share names/But then again who’s praying these days
I’m falling further/Only to be held up spiritual/So it would be a miracle/If I can get over this emptiness I call I breakdown/Lyrical
Right Mind...Write Mine
In order to write mine
I have to be in the right mind
at the right time
so I write time
and time again
until I find
what eyes find
great…
But in order to appear great
I must remove those who seem to grate
Trying to stand in my place
But can’t keep up with my pace
Cause I already have the cheese in this rat race
See I been thinking like Common Sense
Realized I been rapping for a minute
Dress a little different
Sh.. I ain’t been common since {‘88}
The problem is not being common makes me an outkast
So my sarcastic ways retard me from being big
Boi I tell you these 3000 Andres all walking the same way
Standing in the same place
Moving at the same pace
As Baghdad is bombed destroying all race
At this same instance judgment is being rained down from equal sinners
Tellin me I need to get my life together
‘cause we all know that facebook tells my sunshine or stormy weather
But I moving to my right mind
So I can write mine
So these words can be in a stand still time
Hopefully helping me steal time
In the future
For the minds from mine
J.m/\rKs ~~ Poetic JustiZZ
I have to be in the right mind
at the right time
so I write time
and time again
until I find
what eyes find
great…
But in order to appear great
I must remove those who seem to grate
Trying to stand in my place
But can’t keep up with my pace
Cause I already have the cheese in this rat race
See I been thinking like Common Sense
Realized I been rapping for a minute
Dress a little different
Sh.. I ain’t been common since {‘88}
The problem is not being common makes me an outkast
So my sarcastic ways retard me from being big
Boi I tell you these 3000 Andres all walking the same way
Standing in the same place
Moving at the same pace
As Baghdad is bombed destroying all race
At this same instance judgment is being rained down from equal sinners
Tellin me I need to get my life together
‘cause we all know that facebook tells my sunshine or stormy weather
But I moving to my right mind
So I can write mine
So these words can be in a stand still time
Hopefully helping me steal time
In the future
For the minds from mine
J.m/\rKs ~~ Poetic JustiZZ
Crack Music
Life is what you make it
Face it
Life is how you live it
Forgiveness ain't given
Even when there is a witness
Standing on the corner might be the only way to get it
But now yo mama is crying
And all ya potnas is livid
How vivid
Do they remember the times
Of cutting the lines
Perfect supply
Just to get the fein high
My how time flies
These young cats coming in and murdering the old
Not all of them dead yet
I know
'Cause I'm {hear}
And I'll fight for my mother's tears
So please don't push my near
The edge is close
But the few are strong
The weak are plenty
But weeks aren't long
7 days
hours by 24
mintues by 60
seconds aren't pure
I went to the funeral
To his face
His ma crying
Web cams posting this via MySpace
But hey
All's well the ends well ya kno
Even if its burned before the smoke
Truth be told shit ain't the same
Damn I miss the
Damn I miss the
Damm I miss the game
Face it
Life is how you live it
Forgiveness ain't given
Even when there is a witness
Standing on the corner might be the only way to get it
But now yo mama is crying
And all ya potnas is livid
How vivid
Do they remember the times
Of cutting the lines
Perfect supply
Just to get the fein high
My how time flies
These young cats coming in and murdering the old
Not all of them dead yet
I know
'Cause I'm {hear}
And I'll fight for my mother's tears
So please don't push my near
The edge is close
But the few are strong
The weak are plenty
But weeks aren't long
7 days
hours by 24
mintues by 60
seconds aren't pure
I went to the funeral
To his face
His ma crying
Web cams posting this via MySpace
But hey
All's well the ends well ya kno
Even if its burned before the smoke
Truth be told shit ain't the same
Damn I miss the
Damn I miss the
Damm I miss the game
Stuck In The Rain...
They say we N.I. Double G. E.R./But we are much more/Still ya'll choose to ignore/a better life you could explore/Standing in the rain as it pours/getting infected with diseases/Making it hard to [weather] the storm/This is not a simple chore/When there ain't a fucking cure/Magic still got the disease/It's just not as fucking pure/He got tested real early/You ain't been tested before/You just sitting there letting the Reaper close opportunistic doors/Your body is breeding sores/And it burns to the core/to your heart/to your soul/Now you're cold/In the morgue/In purgatory wondering why you wasn't tested before/Now this is the story told to the rich/Not to the poor/To those that don't give a damn/And those that are the suspected source/And can't afford medication to save their lives anymore/So now they're stuck in the hurricane as the rain pours/And don't have the key to the reaper's locked doors/The story that was told/Was never really able to unfold/Just another black body left to stone/Like coal
Become diamonds, get tested...
Become diamonds, get tested...
To who...is unknown
"I’m looking for the girl/who can turn my life around/seeing where I’ve been/knowing my ups from downs/chances of this happening/seems so unrealistic to me/I’m looking in the mirror wondering/where this woman might be…"
Hmmp/as I hide-a-way on the corner of campus/I open eyes and expose myself to you/giving you every ounce truth/every quart of passion/every liter of love/every gallon of myself that I have to offer/no longer holding back from memories of pain or turmoil/rather I/stand stronger and push forward/see/I/enjoy you every step/your every move/your every word/the every kiss that you blow/the day we met/though cliché/you had me at hello/see/sweetie/I don’t know the feelings you have toward me/but I do know that your stares are heavenly/your voice angelic/your vernacular poetic/see you are the rib that I shared now being returned/the completion of a soul that was almost burned/the fairy tale ending to a story full of twist and turns/the house that has sheltered me through the wind and storms/
So/as I stare in the mirror wondering/where that woman might be/I close my eyes and imaging your face/this dream now reality god has given me…
To: Unknown
From: J.m/\rKs
Hmmp/as I hide-a-way on the corner of campus/I open eyes and expose myself to you/giving you every ounce truth/every quart of passion/every liter of love/every gallon of myself that I have to offer/no longer holding back from memories of pain or turmoil/rather I/stand stronger and push forward/see/I/enjoy you every step/your every move/your every word/the every kiss that you blow/the day we met/though cliché/you had me at hello/see/sweetie/I don’t know the feelings you have toward me/but I do know that your stares are heavenly/your voice angelic/your vernacular poetic/see you are the rib that I shared now being returned/the completion of a soul that was almost burned/the fairy tale ending to a story full of twist and turns/the house that has sheltered me through the wind and storms/
So/as I stare in the mirror wondering/where that woman might be/I close my eyes and imaging your face/this dream now reality god has given me…
To: Unknown
From: J.m/\rKs
United...
Don't give the black man books/Gave the red man a dinner/Just so he can forgive us/ every Thanksgiving/Hunt the brown people out so that they can't kill us/Then shoot the other brown people as they cross the river/Brought the black people over, now they're plagued with disease/Looks like this is the American Dream!
Bring it back/Bring it back/Bring it back
I said don't give the black man books/Gave the red man a dinner/Just so he can forgive us/ every Thanksgiving/Hunt the brown people out so that they can't kill us/Then shoot the other brown people as they cross the river/Brought the black people over, now they're plagued with disease/Looks like this is the American Dream!
What more can I say then the truth sometimes/When trying to live in a country full of lies/That used "Willie Lynch" to tear Black people down/When records show there was never a Willie Lynch around/Paper written in the 60s by who knows who/White, Black, or Red, they still spoke the truth/And if I speak too much then I'll be a "Who?"/'Cause the 1st amendment wasn't made for me and you./The richest country in the world, ranked low in education/As our President takes vacations to a camp named David/When "David" has no books to read in class/And tries to go to college, but the work puts him on his ass/And he graduated from school less than a mile from the bedside of Bush/But who cares about the guy they expect to be a crook/Never wanting to hear what the literate black is saying/Afraid that his words could loose the nooses of hangings/So now deprived of a equal opportunity to succeed/Less literate students did this government breed/And they're all different colors/Backgrounds, etcetera/Hopefully one day this government will better us/Instead spying on our conversations to find terrorists/And say they're doing this just to protect us/But if you tell all your plans via FoxNews/Even George Bush would know what not to do
Bring it back/Bring it back/Bring it back
I said don't give the black man books/Gave the red man a dinner/Just so he can forgive us/ every Thanksgiving/Hunt the brown people out so that they can't kill us/Then shoot the other brown people as they cross the river/Brought the black people over, now they're plagued with disease/Looks like this is the American Dream!
What more can I say then the truth sometimes/When trying to live in a country full of lies/That used "Willie Lynch" to tear Black people down/When records show there was never a Willie Lynch around/Paper written in the 60s by who knows who/White, Black, or Red, they still spoke the truth/And if I speak too much then I'll be a "Who?"/'Cause the 1st amendment wasn't made for me and you./The richest country in the world, ranked low in education/As our President takes vacations to a camp named David/When "David" has no books to read in class/And tries to go to college, but the work puts him on his ass/And he graduated from school less than a mile from the bedside of Bush/But who cares about the guy they expect to be a crook/Never wanting to hear what the literate black is saying/Afraid that his words could loose the nooses of hangings/So now deprived of a equal opportunity to succeed/Less literate students did this government breed/And they're all different colors/Backgrounds, etcetera/Hopefully one day this government will better us/Instead spying on our conversations to find terrorists/And say they're doing this just to protect us/But if you tell all your plans via FoxNews/Even George Bush would know what not to do
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